Some consider the GMC Syclone the automotive equivalent of the world’s most fire retardant paper hat. As it is with kinky sex, if you don’t understand it it’s not for you. Me? I get it. This vehicle is a hoot to drive and it’s practical. OK, it’s not ideal for towing anything larger than a Radio Flyer. As an off-roader, speed bumps are a challenge. But when you have to get to the drug store fast, the Syclone is your huckleberry. The Mitsubishi-turbocharged 4.3L six-cylinder power plant pushes the pickup from zero to sixty in 4.3 seconds. That was 31 years ago! Speaking of drugs . . .
If you want to know which car will appreciate in 30 years, check out what drug dealers are driving. In the early nineties, the only guys that copped Premium S10’s like the GMC Syclone were criminal kingpins. The high-performance GMC Sonoma gave its drivers a [relatively] low profile and an excellent chance of outrunning/successfully performing drive-by shootings. This despite an engine that “only” cranked-out 280hp and 350 ft.-lbs. of torque. (Hint: 3597.94 lbs.)
Syclone-driving drug dealers said goodbye to slow cop cars, and I said the Syclone was a good buy. In 2020, these trucks went for $30k. While my fellow car dealers considered the Syclone a drug on the market. I predicted the day would come when a low-miler would hammer for $85k. That day was yesterday. B.A.T. sold an unmolested, loaded black/black Syclone with 18k miles for $80k. In a recession. (OK I was $5k off and B.A.T. takes a pound of flesh. Talk to me when the next cherry Syclone hits the market.)
Some of the truck’s appeal is down to speed. Some of its down to style – often “enhanced” by a pavement scraping suspension and an exhaust system big enough to house a family of four. Most of its down to rarity. GM made 2995 Syclones in 1991 and three in ’92. You’d think GM would have made five more to crest 3k, but then you’d think GM would make a car to rival the Corolla and that still hasn’t happened.
So if you want it, here it is, tell me to go and get it. But you better hurry ’cause they’re going fast. Literally. Oh, and what do today’s drug dealers drive? If we’re to go by cars seized from our black market brothers in 2015, it’s Hummer, Bentley, Ferrari, Lamborghini, Mercedes, BMW, Audi and Corvette. Post-pandemic? Thanks to all that taxpayer cash fueling demand, it’s . . . the same. Minus Hummer. Plus McLaren. (I know a guy.) I’ll leave it to you to find out which models they prefer.
